• October 31, 2014

In praise of purses

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Posted: Friday, March 29, 2013 4:30 am

A lot has been said about women and their purses. Let me say this: I would be lost without my purse.

At my favorite eatery, Rebecca’s Kitchen, certain men like to make fun of my purse, some even calling it a satchel. I am known for rummaging through it like a crazy person, not finding what I’m looking for. Once, I was offered a flashlight to shine into the gaping black hole.

Here’s a message for all you men: We need this stuff.

In my purse, I have, among other items, a big wallet, headache pills (because I have children), gum, deodorant, perfume, pens, my phone charger, lighters, needles and thread, an MP3 player, sunglasses and Band-Aids (again because I have children).

My wallet, which is the size of a large clutch, is filled with more necessities. It holds various credit cards (too many but I wanted the entire color palette), money, store cards, coupons and, most importantly, pictures. If I were to get pulled over, I might have forgotten my license but can present a huge array of pictures of relatives and friends who could vouch for me.

The gum is important because at work I think about the two nearby discount stores and the candy there. Pop in some gum, and I am good, most of the time. You also never know when you might have to mend a sock so I carry needles and thread.

Come to think of it, I don’t need a flashlight to find things. I have lighters to help me, if I can find them.

When children are young, women tend to carry around the equivalency of a suitcase for diapers, powder, bottles, snacks and wipes. I’m grateful my children have outgrown that stage.

A purse is a no-go zone for men. Should circumstances allow the search of a woman’s purse, a man’s tunnel vision prevents him from finding anything anyway. That is a fact backed by years of observation of the men in my family. I can provide statistical data for anyone interested.

My purse is packed and heavy enough to ward off robbers if I swing it at them. The best thing about it is, I don’t need a gun permit to use it as a weapon.

I just bought my 9-year-old daughter her first real purse. I was tired of shoving her belongings into mine. It took her awhile to get used to carrying something over her shoulder, but we all have to start somewhere.

She can pack whatever she needs in there when going on outings or shopping trips. And my purse is free again for my things.

My arms aren’t free all the time, though, as sometimes I have to hold two purses because hers is too heavy.

You win some, you lose some.

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