Originally, this column was going to be about my favorite four letter word — after food and free, of course: Fall.
I was going to talk about all the fun and festive things we have been doing and how much pumpkin-spiced foods I have force-fed my family.
Well, that was before I decided to take out and clean my kid’s car seats and make them forward facing.
The twins both met the requirements to be turned around and I was finally at my wits end with cleaning up car sick messes.
“How hard could it possibly be?” I thought to myself. Naturally, I couldn’t find the instruction manuals the seats came with, so I turned to the Internet. I read the manufacturer’s instructions on their website and watched their videos.
Seemed simple enough.
“This is going to be a cakewalk”, I said to myself. I figured I would tackle this little project during nap time and then I would have plenty of time to binge-watch the rest of my shows. A perfect Sunday was about to go down.
Let me tell you, I have done a lot of difficult things in my life. I got my master’s degree, had twins, but nothing prepared me for forward-facing car seat installation.
The woman in the video made it look so easy. She flipped the massive seat around and installed it in a swift 3 minutes and 45 seconds.
It took me 10 minutes just to unsnap and wrestle one seat out of the car.
Then it took me three Internet searches and 20 minutes to figure out how to change the incline position so the seat would sit flat on the seat.
Surely, the hard parts were behind me. According to the video, I just need to turn this knob counter-clockwise, the seat should lift up and I will be able to thread the seatbelt easily through it.
After the profanity I spewed from my mouth, I need to go to confession. I don’t want to wrestle with another seatbelt for as long as I live.
Just when I thought I had it, it locked on me and I had to start all over again for the tenth time.
An hour and a soaked shirt later, I had finally figured out the incline, defeated the seatbelt and was ready to anchor the bad boy behind the seat. I have two degrees and I couldn’t figure out how to release the slack in the anchor. After throwing a temper tantrum in the back seat, by the grace of God I figured it out. He must have felt really sorry for me, and decided to throw me a bone.
Let me remind you, the woman in the video accomplished this in less than four minutes. Then you have me, covered in sweat, an hour and a half later with one more seat to tackle.
Now I know why I make my husband do these things. I am not equipped with the gifts or the patience to execute tasks of this nature.
With one seat installed, you would assume the second installation would progress much faster. You know what they say about making assumptions right?
Granted, the second seat took 30 minutes less to manhandle, but I still fought the same fight and still repeated the same bad words.
Almost three hours later, both seats were forward facing and the twins were waking up from their nap.
Sigh, no TV binge-watching reward for me.
Instead, I strapped the kids in to their now forward-facing seats to revel in my accomplishment. The looks on their faces made the entire sweat and curse fest worth it. Just to blow their minds further, I decided to get the car washed.
Too bad car washes aren’t free, because I would have gone through it a million times just to hear my kids squeal with excitement.
If the thought of having a third baby ever crosses my mind, all I have to do is visualize forward-facing car seat installation.
Vanessa Lynch is a military spouse, mom and a former metro editor for the Killeen Daily Herald.