All marriages have moments and seasons where marriage is tough.
When we are walking through these seasons we must remember, it is just a season, and seasons change.
Don’t make any permanent decisions in a changing season.
The good news is there are some practical things you can do to help restore the connection with your spouse during times of trials.
1. Make your spouse’s favorite dinner or take him or her out to eat. It’s an easy gesture that shows you care.
2. Post something sweet on social media about your spouse. Tell the world why you love him/her.
3. Ask your spouse, “What can I help you with?” Be ready to help when you ask this.
4. Give your spouse a hug. Never underestimate the effect non-sexual physical contact can have.
5. Look your spouse in the eye and say, “I’m sorry for (fill in the blank).”
6. If your spouse has wronged you, choose to forgive — and say so. There’s redemptive power in forgiveness.
7. Say, “I love you” in creative ways. Think Post-it notes, mirrors and notes in the car.
8. Write a love letter detailing why you chose him/her to be your spouse. Then read it to him/her.
9. Play a game together (cards, Monopoly, Dominos). Recreational companionship is something we often don’t do enough of in marriage.
10. Build something together or paint a room in your house to beautify your space. Projects completed together can bring unity and give both spouses a sense of pride.
11. Watch the movie “Fireproof” together. Make sure to turn out all lights. Include boxes of candy, popcorn, and soda for the full movie theater experience.
12. Do “The Love Dare” book based off the Fireproof movie. It can be purchased on Amazon.
13. Thank your spouse for all he or she does for your family, whether it’s inside or outside your home.
14. Go on a walk and hold hands.
15. Do something around the house your spouse has been asking for you to do.
16. Ask yourself, “What do I need to change in me to be a better husband/wife?” Begin working on changing you.
17. Read, “The Five Love Languages” to get an idea of how your spouse receives love.
18. Plan a romantic night. Find a babysitter or put the children to bed early.
19. Clean your house. I know this seems odd when we are talking about helping your marriage, but studies have proven a cluttered house leads to more chaotic homes and marriages.
20. Take care of yourself. Get your hair cut, nails done, shave, and put on nice clothes. Make sure you are taking time to look your best for your spouse. No one wants a frumpy spouse!
Of course, the best way to weather the hard times is to prevent them.
These tips can be implemented in the good seasons to make deposits into your marriage love bank.
For more inspiration, be sure to do number 12 above.
Until next time, happy marriage restoring!
Kindra Warner is a marriage group facilitator at Grace Christian Center in Killeen and a Herald correspondent.